Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Sad, but okay

I was trying to decide what to catch up on today, but got sidetracked by an interesting phone call. It initially made me mad, but now I am a little sad, yet relieved. 

Friendship, especially new ones, can be tricky. I am fairly new to the city where my family lives. I have lived in the city we moved from basically my whole life. I am pretty shy when it comes to meeting new people and making friends, so I don't feel very comfortable reaching out. I got lucky big time by moving next door to some pretty remarkable people, but aside from them and a couple of other neighbors, I kept pretty much to myself. 

Of course I realized I needed to expand my social circle for a number of reasons. Not easy for a girl like me.

So time passed, and I made a few more friends. One in particular seemed to extend friendship more heartily and quickly than anyone else. I won't get into specifics, but  believe all relationships need time to flourish. Still, how do you turn away what seems to be a genuine offer? 

Without getting into the gory details, Over the past months I have had a few misgivings about this person (she continually talks behind the back of another friend of ours, among other things-very high school), but thought I might be holding some of my past experiences against her. Didn't trust my gut. Always a bad idea. 

In any event, I just found out that my misgivings were for good reason. It makes me sad, but it is for the best. I am a very straightforward person, and what you see is what you get. While I don't expect others to be like me, I have issue with those who misrepresent themselves, especially in order to establish relationships.

My husband likes to tell everyone about how I didn't wear any make-up on our first date. Well the truth of the matter is, if I am not on stage, I rarely wear make-up. While I suppose I could have put forth a little more effort for the man, I was being me. He can never say he didn't know the job when he took it, about ANYTHING. I think that has saved me (and hopefully others in my life) lots of time and heartache.

So I am sad that this friendship (real pr pseudo) is over, mainly because I am an emotional girl. At the same time, I am glad to know early on that there is no need to waste precious positive energy on something that most likely will continue (already has before today) to cause me and my family discomfort and/or pain. 

I made a decision long ago to only surround myself and my family with positive people. It is a process. One well worth undertaking. I stopped inviting drama into my life. I don't want mine, so I definitely don't want anybody else's!!! Soooooo, another day, another lesson learned.

Before I sign off, I want to say how  good it felt to be welcomed back. Thank you. I have missed the blog world.


Salzwedel Family said...

Oh, I know exactly what you mean. I've had to deal with drama with family my whole life - I'm not going to choose it when it's optional. That doesn't make the hurt any less though. Sorry you had to go through this.

Anonymous said...

Yuck. You are too amazing of a person to deal with that anyway.

Anonymous said...

Oh and we think you guys are remarkable too. The day you moved was a sad one for us.

We had a BLAST tonight. Let's do it again really soon.

Dale is as goofy as Brian. They are perfect for eachother.

I also believe I have found my coca-cola soulmate.

Love you guys.