While I was away, I did a lot of reading. Adoption forums consumed me for a time. At first I was fascinated. I felt like I could get some real prospective on those forums. There were all members of the adoption triad posting. I really wanted to know how an adopted adult, and a birthmother might feel, and of course it was great to learn about the experiences of other adoptive parents.
Ultimately, I had to step away. Some of what I learned, I am sure most of you already know. Adoption is BIG business!! With all of what that implies. There are many, many heartbreaking stories. Too many for my heart to handle sometimes. There was much more anger and disagreeing in areas I would have never expected. It got very hard to read. Birthmothers, adopted children (now adults), and adoptive parents had stories, and opinions, that occasionally made me rethink my decision to adopt. Mainly, because I didn't want to risk being a part of someone's pain.
Then I woke up!!!! Life is a risk. I had to remind myself that the internet can be a wonderful resource, but it can also be dangerous. For those like me who believe knowledge is power, it is easy to go a little overboard on the web.
I pray for those in the adoption world who were or feel wronged and betrayed. For those who lie to get what they want, those who scam or have been scammed, for those who see adopting as anything other than a beautiful gift, for those who want to parent but can't, for all the good, bad, and otherwise in the adoption world. When all is said and done, it really is about God's grace and these precious little lives that we are led to provide for. Be it providing as a birthmom, an adoptive parent, an adoption professional, a volunteer, or whatever, these children are heaven sent.
People have a tendency to comment on how blessed a child that we adopt will be, and while we want nothing more to bless our baby's life, that child will bless US and our lives!!! I know I am preaching to the choir, but just thinking about it fills me up!!
This journey is not easy, but I can't wait to get to the destination.
2 comments:
OK, I'm starting to feel like a stalker since I'm the lone commenter on the last couple of posts. Oh well, I like to give & receive comments so here goes...
Looking at forums can be informational, but very consuming. It is indeed better to step away from it. I think the journey of adoption blesses everyone who opens their heart to it.
You are so right. Awesome post. And stay away from forums!!!
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